Therapy can feel anxiety provoking and even intimidating. It’s a HUGE COURAGEOUS STEP to improving your life! The old stereotype of the cold distant therapist blankly staring at you over a clipboard haunts many people. Sometimes when I meet with couples, they cite the horrible examples of therapy on television where therapists set couples up to fail and watch them fight for ratings. UGH!
I find great joy and reassuring couples and individuals that our sessions will be nothing like that. Here a three things that you can expect from me. I enjoy being transparent about what you can expect from sessions.
- Sessions will not involve bickering and fighting between couples. That doesn’t mean that we won’t address the difficult topics. However, I practice Imago therapy and use a dialogue structure that does not allow for either partner to be interrupted when they’re expressing themselves. Each partner has the opportunity to feel heard equally, as I actively coach throughout sessions to enable each partner to express themselves in a way that reduces criticism defensiveness, contempt blaming, and shaming.
- I will not take sides. Through our work together, I will be helping each partner learn to look past who’s right and who’s wrong but to find common ground and new ways of hearing and understanding each other and yourself. All Views are equally respected and heard, and while partners may not always agree, I will help you work past those moments to be mindful and remember that you care about each other, even when you disagree. As the partnership evolves, couples learn to stop trying to change each other and to accept each other as they are for their genuine self. It is common in this stage of therapy for partners to discover personal strengths and abilities that they didn’t notice in the past.
- I will be genuine with you. I will not be an unreadable, cold, and distant therapist. I invite warmth, compassion, and wholeheartedly encourage humor in my sessions. Clients have described me as funny, honest, accepting, and truly curious to get to know the real you. I absolutely love this work and I do not hide my enthusiasm.